February 1, 2018 by Administrator

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Happy New Year, Family!

Yes, I know it’s February, but it’s the first time I get to say Happy New Year, so there you have it.

Welcome to Tamika Talks!, my monthly check-in where you’ll get my thoughts on free and full living, of course from a dfree perspective!

So here we are, in the new year’s second month. If you’re anything like most people, you roared into 2018 with engines on full throttle, prayers in your pocket, peace in your heart (hopefully), and resolutions in tow. So, tell me, how’s that going for you?!?

If you’re still “on it,” CONGRATULATIONS and keep going! Butttt, if you’re in that group of folks that are not so “on it” any more, there is still HOPE.

You see, your resolutions are really just that…RE-solutions…the opportunity to imagine a new way to solve the problems of life!

Me, personally, I am all about ACTION…divinely guided action, but action nonetheless. My path to RE-solution in any area of my life tends to look a little bit like this…

Pray for what I desire
Meditate and wait to hear from God
Think through the simplest, most practical next steps; and
Do! I get to work!

Now, I know that seems simple. And for the “on it” crowd, you’re nodding and preparing to close your browser and get on with your life — which is totally fine. God speed! See you next month! But for those of us still working to get the motors running, I’ll expand just a little bit more.

1) Get Quiet. Get connected.
Truly tune into to your Source. Give Jesus your undivided attention for a second. Yield to the power that is bigger, stronger and wiser than you. This may look different for everyone. For me, it may be journaling to get the thoughts out of my head and reading the Bible to refill my cup. It may be prayer in the car and then silence for the rest of the ride. It might even be noise cancelling headphones while on the treadmill or laying on the couch alone with a candle. The important thing is, whatever it takes for you to silence the noise around you and tune into God, do that!

2) Get Perspective
Look Back. Are there any nagging challenges or resolutions that need another chance? If there are things that you have yet to complete but are still important to you, by all means carry them forward!

TT Secret: In 2017 I beat myself all the way up, repeatedly, for not feeling like I was working toward particular goals. I was powering through but felt a little powerless all year. I prayed and vowed to not let 2018 be the same. God revealed my “aha” while on the elliptical a few days ago. (See what I did there, YEP, I’m on it!)

Anyway, I realized that, while I have had very concrete goals for most of my adult life, I was trying too hard to do them all and accomplish the most each year! I had concrete, worthy, amazing goals — and a whole lot of them. In fact, too many to accomplish in a single year. The bulk of them were actually goals for a lifetime. And to be honest, I just wasn’t ready!

(Post: Some goals you just have to grow into!) They require you to be/do/experience some things to make you worthy and them reasonable!

(Post: You had to be him/her in order to become YOU!)

Look Forward. I prefer to work from big to small, meaning from ideal life to immediate goals/actions. Ask yourself a series of questions to envision your true goals.

What is your big, ideal life-view?
What is important to you right now?
What do you hope to achieve in the fairly immediate future (1-3 years)?

Go as big and as broad as you can, considering every major area of your life, and write down your life-view. Think personal, relational, professional, spiritual and financial (of course!).

Having a semi-clear vision of your ideal life may help to inform your immediate goals. If you can’t see the entire staircase, feel free to start with a few stairs.

3) Get to work!
Last but not least, you have to do the work! Assess your daily, weekly, monthly and quarterly life habits and happenings. Your ultimate success, in anything, depends on what you do regularly! Adjust to make your goals happen.

You’ve got some time to get it together, but don’t dawdle because time waits for no man or woman!

Again, it’s still January (or early February). Let’s put 2018 on the good foot with goals and “the GO” to match!

Thanks for reading. I look forward to talking more this year!

Here’s to an AMAZING year!

Big hugs and best wishes,


@TheFreeBlackGirl (IG)
@OGFreeBlackGirl (Twitter)

P.S. In January, I had the chance to Live The Dream and share my MLK inspiration with the folks at BET. Check it out here!

P.S. I wouldn’t be the @TheFreeBlackGirl if I didn’t get you ready for Black History Month! Stay tuned for 28 days of Free Black Brilliance coming your way next month!!!

Stay tuned. Stay connected.

IG is my favorite digital destination! Check us out on @mydfree @dbsoaries @thefreeblackgirl